![]() To try it: If your desire is an encounter that focuses more heavily on sensuality, tell your partner you'd like to take things slower than usual the next time you have sex. "In general, women are more inclined to arrange the stage and draw in their emotional-intellectual sensuality before attempting a scene where they lose control and become an object of someone else’s desires," says Cadell. This often involves a vision of being pursued and desired by a partner before the actual sex act takes place. When many women fantasize, they are much more likely than men to consider the emotional back story of the encounter they're imagining. Sure, it's not all the way outdoors, but it provides much of the same experience without the risk. Have as much sex as you want in your tent. To try it: If you want to feel the thrill without risking arrest, consider taking a sexy camping trip with your partner. It's easy to see why it's such a common desire-it brings a huge thrill and heightening of the senses. All that said, there is nothing wrong with being turned on by the idea of getting it on outdoors. (It's one thing if your audience knows what to expect and is in on the experience with you, but most often, they are not, and it's unfair to subject someone to a sexual situation in a public place when they did not consent to it.) If you want to have public sex, try it out at your own risk (and away from strangers' eyes), and keep in mind that you could get arrested. Outdoor Sexīig disclaimer: public sex is illegal! It can also be disturbing to viewers if it's carried out in front of unsuspecting strangers. ![]() "Find out what’s out there and what turns you on." 3. "Ideally, you can go with your lover and pick out a paddle for spanking or a flogger for tickling and gentle punishment that you both find hot," says Cadell. After a little playful research, do some shopping with your partner, either online or at a sex shop. For more tips on the basics of BDSM, Cadell suggests the work of BDSM expert Sunny Megatron to guide you through setting the scene for your first experience. ![]() If you're looking to experiment with bondage, you can learn more about that here. ** Whatever your motivations may be, threesomes can be a great way to have fun and explore your sexuality. Maybe you want to experience having two partners at the same time, or to have a sexual experience with whatever gender you usually ** don't hook up with. Perhaps you've always wanted to watch your partner have sex with someone else, or wanted them to watch you get with someone else. Threesomes are a common fantasy in their own right, but they're also a means to living out several other more specific fantasies. Below, a look at some of the most common desires among women, and how to make them happen. That said, if you're hoping to make a fantasy come to life, it can be tough to know where to get started. In short, about a million different fantasies exist, and anything safe and consensual is a-okay to explore. ![]() "All forms of fantasy, kinky or otherwise, are a healthy part of sexuality," sex expert Ava Cadell, Ph.D., tells SELF.Ī recent study conducted by Cadell, called the Loveology Sexual Compatibility Survey, which gathered data from over a thousand participants, found that popular fantasies include sexual massage, oral sex, threesomes, outdoor sex, sex with a stranger, domination/submissive play, exhibitionism, voyeurism, and sex tapes. Sexual fantasies are very common and very normal. Ever find yourself visualizing steamy scenarios to get yourself turned on? You're far from the only one.
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